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AnimeNation Adventures: Invasion of the Pedobots (Part 1)
Posted February 15th, 2012 at 12:38 PM by A Dead Spy
Updated February 15th, 2012 at 01:07 PM by A Dead Spy
Updated February 15th, 2012 at 01:07 PM by A Dead Spy
"Help me, Asuka."
A Dead Spy groaned, never having hated his life more than he had the very moment the entire group decided to pop in the movie End of Evangelion. Cursing Nutmeg for no doubt knowing his ultimate weakness in terms of anime, he nonetheless flopped himself on his chair in defeat while virtually all of AnimeNation was invited to watch the movie.
"I can't believe she talked me into this ****," ADS sighed to himself, forcing himself to watch Shinji's long emo rant to a comatose Asuka. "It's not like the Alpha Female Wars are really my fault, right?"
"Well, you did fail to act on a crucial moment," Plough coughed, nearly choking on his popcorn.
"And you let Ryuuji die in your pent-up depression," Midget added. "Not unlike Shinji himself, in fact-"
"Shut up," ADS warned the moment Shinji revealed Asuka's naked breasts in his desperation. Knowing exactly what was coming next, ADS chanted Shinji's mantra of "I mustn't run away" in his head.
"Look at him down there," Melion sighed in pity. "Poor guy can't even handle one little masturbation scene."
"It's not like they show him doing it, you know," AG teased, practically in glee along with the rest of the group over ADS's obvious dismay.
"Hell, he's probably masturbated to this scene himself," Vaikyuko commented, clearly pushing ADS near his breaking point.
"No talking during the movie, guys," ADS ordered, glaring intensely at the others. "I mean it this time."
The silence from the crowd finally in motion, ADS was in enough peace to dwell once again on the recent Alpha War, and the consequences that followed. Sure enough, he felt the heavy burdens of his recent failures, for although the war was finally over, many lives were still taken, a fact that he knew he'd have to live with for the rest of his life.
Reflecting upon such matters, he looked at his right hand, then focused back toward the movie screen where he found Shinji following suit with his own jizz-filled hand.
"I'm so ****ed up," both ADS and Shinji declared in unison.
The movie continued onward as ADS and crew viewed it with extremely awkward comments every now and then. Thoughts of wishing imminent death upon Hideaki Anno repeatedly coursed through ADS's head right until the movie was over, when the lights came back on throughout the private home theater.
"Alright, show's over," ADS groaned, still twitching from the horrors brought over by the movie's "**** you" to the audience as well as Giant Naked Rei's hand vaginas. "Everyone out of my theater; I need to freaking sleep."
"Awww, don't be like that, Spy," Nutmeg protested. "It's not like we were all out to get you or anything."
"Likely story, coming from the hostess of this little event..."
"Well, it was only fair we put the choice of movie to a vote. Let me tell you, it was either this or Boku no Pico, and I know damn well no one in their right mind-"
"Whatever," ADS interrupted. "I know when I've been out-trolled by the entire community, nominating those two..."
"Look, at least let me make it up to you," Nutmeg suggested before ADS could march toward the exit. "How about we all stay and watch Lagann-hen? I know it's your favorite and all."
"Do whatever you want, I suppose," ADS sighed, allowing nothing else to stop him on his way to leaving his damned theater as he marched onward. "I'm too tired to watch **** right now..."
With Nutmeg's efforts futile, ADS was gone in a flash. Groaning, she turned back to her seat in wait for ADS's return while everyone else began to follow ADS out the door.
"That stubborn little... who did vote for those two shows, anyway?"
Taking out her laptop, Nutmeg checked the "What movie should we make ADS watch?" thread online, only to sit in horror as to those who posted.
"ChildRapeITA...? MolestChildren...? SexWith6y.oKids...?"
As her suspicions grew, Nutmeg stood back up and ran right to the center of the movie screen, her irate expression saying it all.
"Alright, speak up!" Nutmeg demanded, her voice booming through the magic of loudspeakers. "Which one of you trolls is responsible for spamming-"
"I CAN'T GET OUT!"
"The exit's locked!"
"That conniving, transgendered bastard! He planned this all along, didn't he?!"
As the interruptions of screaming and hollering grew louder by the second, Nutmeg's voice suddenly grew much quieter as the loudspeakers were overrun by the sound of another movie starting.
"What's going on?" was all Nutmeg could ask as she finally noticed what looked like a peculiar set of young Vocaloid cosplayers in the back row, each looking no older than 10. Curiously, she walked past the shocked audience toward the suspicious looking kids.
"Aren't you folks a little too young to be watching this-"
"On the contrary, username Nutmeg," the girl in the Hatsune Miku cosplay spoke in a clearly artificial sounding monotone. "We have existed long before your kind, taking on all forms imaginable to your human minds."
"And now with your moderator, username A Dead Spy gone, we are here to take back what is rightfully ours," a miniature Luka cosplayer followed up, allowing for Nutmeg the time to let her coming peril sink in.
"ADS is a mod now?" Nutmeg thought to herself. "News to me..."
"As you can see, username Nutmeg, we have prepared this trap specifically for everyone present in this theater," the Miku continued. "I sense already their minds are about to break, as will yours in time."
"And with the nigh entire population of AnimeNation at our mercy, the moderators will have no choice but to surrender to us," the Luka finished. "Resistance, as you can see, is useless."
Nutmeg simply growled at the little monsters, ignoring what she dismissed as a childish prank until she looked more closely at the rest of the audience. To her horror, all else present were either holding their heads tightly while screaming in desperation, or comatose upon watching the terrors that presented themselves on the screen behind her.
"It couldn't be..."
Curiosity getting the best of her, Nutmeg turned around to realize her suspicions of the blatant shota rape now polluting the theater.
"Boku... no Pico..." Nutmeg whispered in a daze, immediately passing out along with the rest of AN.
A Dead Spy groaned, never having hated his life more than he had the very moment the entire group decided to pop in the movie End of Evangelion. Cursing Nutmeg for no doubt knowing his ultimate weakness in terms of anime, he nonetheless flopped himself on his chair in defeat while virtually all of AnimeNation was invited to watch the movie.
"I can't believe she talked me into this ****," ADS sighed to himself, forcing himself to watch Shinji's long emo rant to a comatose Asuka. "It's not like the Alpha Female Wars are really my fault, right?"
"Well, you did fail to act on a crucial moment," Plough coughed, nearly choking on his popcorn.
"And you let Ryuuji die in your pent-up depression," Midget added. "Not unlike Shinji himself, in fact-"
"Shut up," ADS warned the moment Shinji revealed Asuka's naked breasts in his desperation. Knowing exactly what was coming next, ADS chanted Shinji's mantra of "I mustn't run away" in his head.
"Look at him down there," Melion sighed in pity. "Poor guy can't even handle one little masturbation scene."
"It's not like they show him doing it, you know," AG teased, practically in glee along with the rest of the group over ADS's obvious dismay.
"Hell, he's probably masturbated to this scene himself," Vaikyuko commented, clearly pushing ADS near his breaking point.
"No talking during the movie, guys," ADS ordered, glaring intensely at the others. "I mean it this time."
The silence from the crowd finally in motion, ADS was in enough peace to dwell once again on the recent Alpha War, and the consequences that followed. Sure enough, he felt the heavy burdens of his recent failures, for although the war was finally over, many lives were still taken, a fact that he knew he'd have to live with for the rest of his life.
Reflecting upon such matters, he looked at his right hand, then focused back toward the movie screen where he found Shinji following suit with his own jizz-filled hand.
"I'm so ****ed up," both ADS and Shinji declared in unison.
The movie continued onward as ADS and crew viewed it with extremely awkward comments every now and then. Thoughts of wishing imminent death upon Hideaki Anno repeatedly coursed through ADS's head right until the movie was over, when the lights came back on throughout the private home theater.
"Alright, show's over," ADS groaned, still twitching from the horrors brought over by the movie's "**** you" to the audience as well as Giant Naked Rei's hand vaginas. "Everyone out of my theater; I need to freaking sleep."
"Awww, don't be like that, Spy," Nutmeg protested. "It's not like we were all out to get you or anything."
"Likely story, coming from the hostess of this little event..."
"Well, it was only fair we put the choice of movie to a vote. Let me tell you, it was either this or Boku no Pico, and I know damn well no one in their right mind-"
"Whatever," ADS interrupted. "I know when I've been out-trolled by the entire community, nominating those two..."
"Look, at least let me make it up to you," Nutmeg suggested before ADS could march toward the exit. "How about we all stay and watch Lagann-hen? I know it's your favorite and all."
"Do whatever you want, I suppose," ADS sighed, allowing nothing else to stop him on his way to leaving his damned theater as he marched onward. "I'm too tired to watch **** right now..."
With Nutmeg's efforts futile, ADS was gone in a flash. Groaning, she turned back to her seat in wait for ADS's return while everyone else began to follow ADS out the door.
"That stubborn little... who did vote for those two shows, anyway?"
Taking out her laptop, Nutmeg checked the "What movie should we make ADS watch?" thread online, only to sit in horror as to those who posted.
"ChildRapeITA...? MolestChildren...? SexWith6y.oKids...?"
As her suspicions grew, Nutmeg stood back up and ran right to the center of the movie screen, her irate expression saying it all.
"Alright, speak up!" Nutmeg demanded, her voice booming through the magic of loudspeakers. "Which one of you trolls is responsible for spamming-"
"I CAN'T GET OUT!"
"The exit's locked!"
"That conniving, transgendered bastard! He planned this all along, didn't he?!"
As the interruptions of screaming and hollering grew louder by the second, Nutmeg's voice suddenly grew much quieter as the loudspeakers were overrun by the sound of another movie starting.
"What's going on?" was all Nutmeg could ask as she finally noticed what looked like a peculiar set of young Vocaloid cosplayers in the back row, each looking no older than 10. Curiously, she walked past the shocked audience toward the suspicious looking kids.
"Aren't you folks a little too young to be watching this-"
"On the contrary, username Nutmeg," the girl in the Hatsune Miku cosplay spoke in a clearly artificial sounding monotone. "We have existed long before your kind, taking on all forms imaginable to your human minds."
"And now with your moderator, username A Dead Spy gone, we are here to take back what is rightfully ours," a miniature Luka cosplayer followed up, allowing for Nutmeg the time to let her coming peril sink in.
"ADS is a mod now?" Nutmeg thought to herself. "News to me..."
"As you can see, username Nutmeg, we have prepared this trap specifically for everyone present in this theater," the Miku continued. "I sense already their minds are about to break, as will yours in time."
"And with the nigh entire population of AnimeNation at our mercy, the moderators will have no choice but to surrender to us," the Luka finished. "Resistance, as you can see, is useless."
Nutmeg simply growled at the little monsters, ignoring what she dismissed as a childish prank until she looked more closely at the rest of the audience. To her horror, all else present were either holding their heads tightly while screaming in desperation, or comatose upon watching the terrors that presented themselves on the screen behind her.
"It couldn't be..."
Curiosity getting the best of her, Nutmeg turned around to realize her suspicions of the blatant shota rape now polluting the theater.
"Boku... no Pico..." Nutmeg whispered in a daze, immediately passing out along with the rest of AN.
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