Quotes and Quoters

[Kyuu Dan]

As far as I know, there isn't an active thread on this topic, so here goes.

Post any fun/serious/so-true-it-makes-you-want-to-curse/entertaining/etc. you've got. Have a laugh, not an argument.

Here's a few favorites of mine:

"Just because I eat the $h!t doesn't mean I won't throw it back up."

"Fear only that of which does not exist."

"Regretting instead of forgetting was somebody else."

"Sadness is just the absence of a reason to smile, therefore sadness is simply the absence of a yellow ducky."

"If I fly any higher I'll lose sight of the ground."



"It's okay to be messed up. Just know that there are five guys out there just as messed up as you are."

*Courtesy of Ken



Julie: OMG WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU TWO!?
Amanda: ...well...there was this truck... *covered in fake blood*
Aki: ...*nods* ..we didnt have time to get out of the way. *covered in fake blood*
Julie: ...what?
Amanda: im sorry i have to be the one to tell you this...
Aki: we're dead.

*Courtesy of Aki



"The mind is its own place, and in itself Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven."



"You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?"



"A Man is a God in ruin."



"I'm not crazy."



"Bite me, I bite back. Simple."

"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door."

"Sinning wouldn't be so popular if it's wages were paid immediately."

"My parents hated me when i was little, my bath toys were a paperclip and a toaster."

"If you learn from your mistakes, then why ain't i a genius?"

"It's important to watch what you eat. otherwise, how are you going to get it into your mouth?"

The dream situation

Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Amanda: A professional Criminal
Teacher: ...
Teacher: Please take this seriously.
Amanda: What, haven't you ever wanted to break laws and get paid?

Amanda:can you get cornered in a round room?
Me:yes >.>
Me: but not technically

Amanda: *says something stupid*
Me: *eyeroll*
Amanda: what
Me: Nothing
Me: Nothing at all
Amanda: liar
Me: of course



"What doesn't kill me better run away very fast."*

"If you're going to destroy a classic, the least you can do is learn the words."

"If the eyes are the mirror to the soul, then I'm in trouble because no one is home."*

*heard from him, not sure if it's his.



HWMNBN: Sorry
Me: Don't worry about it. I'm annoying, remember?

Me: Hey, you talking today?
HWMNBN: No. Why?

Me: Ever hear of Gary Allen? He's a country singer.
HWMNBN: no
Me: One of his songs is entitled "I just got back from Hell"
HWMNBN: not as good as
HWMNBN: "i wanna f*ck a dog in the a$$" by blink 182
HWMNBN: oooh you just got schooled




"i'll be making some "Save Alex" shirts."



"Those who cast the votes decide nothing; those who count the votes decide everything."



Me: Look, I have sugar! *holds out sugar packets*
Amanda: *Steals one, opens it, downs it, glances around."
Me: *opens my own and eats it*
Nick: Is that Cocaine?!
Amanda and I: *share glances*
Amanda: Sure, why not.
Nick: Huh?

Nick: Soda is poison.
Amanda: Is not.
Amanda: *takes out sharpie and writes 'poison' on her soda can*
Amanda: Now it's good tasting poison.

Or an entire page full. ^_^

[Jon]

Here's one of my personal favorites:

I like big butts and I cannot lie.

[Kyuu Dan]

Here's one of my personal favorites:
I like big butts and I cannot lie.

:-"

I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. :ph34r:

[Evil_Koala]

I don't wanna say that you're pretentious. So I'll quote someone on it.

Vegeta! What's the scouter say about her pretentious level?It's over NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAND!!!

[Lord Timaeus]

Because everyone needs to know that this guy is jeopardizing the space-time continuum :

I got turkey.

I would say anyone who was around before the chat threads were destroyed Is veteran. 2005 is still 4 years ago, that must account for something.

[Evil_Koala]

Because everyone needs to know that this guy is jeopardizing the space-time continuum :

I didn't expect to lol but I did.

[Mizumi]

"Somebody may beat me but there gonna have to bleed to do it"

"The only good race pace is suicide pace and today looks like a good day to die"

Steve "Pre" Prefontaine

[Reidar]

I don't care if I die, as long as they bury me in a big ****ing box.

[VidelCoolGirl]

"Don't Trust Whitey."

[MirKz]

A friend

I'm here for a good time, not a long time

Another friend

"Live like you'll die tomorrow, love like you'll live forever"

Some Random

"To be old and wise you must first be young and stupid."

There's my few..

[Alice Catherine]

Originally Posted by He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" (and me)

HWMNBN: Sorry
Me: Don't worry about it. I'm annoying, remember?

Me: Hey, you talking today?
HWMNBN: No. Why?

Me: Ever hear of Gary Allen? He's a country singer.
HWMNBN: no
Me: One of his songs is entitled "I just got back from Hell"
HWMNBN: not as good as
HWMNBN: "i wanna f*ck a dog in the a$$" by blink 182
HWMNBN: oooh you just got schooled

This seriously happened?

No it didn't. Why must you make this forum a house of LIES?

[Samurai Drifter]

"Rush can only be played at two volumes:
****ING LOUD
and
INCREDIBLY ****ING, DEAFENING AND MAKES MY EARS BLEED LOUD.

The latter option is used during their concerts."



"'Bob's' promise is to widen the scope and nature of abnormal behavior... to explore NEW WAYS of going over the edge and coming back. PLUS to bring back those who couldn't on their own... to help you create the HIGHEST POSSIBLE EARNINGS from the PSYCHODYNAMICS of ABNORMALITY... to turn conspiracy implanted personality disorders AROUND and channel them into an ILLUSION OF CREATIVITY that will fool normals and GET YOU SEX!"

And, of course, bash.org has hundreds.


[TN]FBMachine: i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section

Sonium: someone speak python here?
lucky: HHHHHSSSSSHSSS
lucky: SSSSS
Sonium: the programming language

Zanthis(ALE): AFK, tornado


And, just because it proves me right:


"We are grateful to The Washington Post, The New York Times, Time Magazine and other great publications whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises of discretion for almost forty years. It would have been impossible for us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subject to the bright lights of publicity during those years. But, the work is now much more sophisticated and prepared to march towards a world government. The supranational sovereignty of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the national auto-determination practiced in past centuries."

[Bernard_Monsha]

From the godlike Triggerbaby, the best thing about Canada.


This thread is the gift that keeps on giving. A cornacopia of stupid. The Fountain of Duh


Of course we have CTL on advise for an Anniversary present.


Nothing says love like anal.

[Ikari Warrior]

If at first you don't succeed, cheat.
...
Repeat until caught.
...
Then lie.
Any fans of SOMAT here?

[Kyuu Dan]

This seriously happened?

No it didn't. Why must you make this forum a house of LIES?

"What you talkin' 'bout Willis?"

We've been over this already, but yes. I've got the AIM logs to prove it. ^_^

Amanda reminded me, here's a fun one.

Me: That's so cracked!
Nick: You're on crack?!
Me: ...
(a few minutes later)
Amanda: See? There is a method to my madness.
Nick: You're on Meth?
Amanda: No...?
Nick: Oh this is just great. All of my friends are falling to drugs. Ro's on crack and Amanda's on Meth.
Amanda: And that's why we don't give you sugar *is holding a sugar packet*.

And then just a random blurb from French Class (yesterday):

"Look, pot leaves!"

[Holy Knight]

"'Bob's' promise is to widen the scope and nature of abnormal behavior... to explore NEW WAYS of going over the edge and coming back. PLUS to bring back those who couldn't on their own... to help you create the HIGHEST POSSIBLE EARNINGS from the PSYCHODYNAMICS of ABNORMALITY... to turn conspiracy implanted personality disorders AROUND and channel them into an ILLUSION OF CREATIVITY that will fool normals and GET YOU SEX!"

<Writes this book on his "must buy" list>

Now, I must express my shame and astonishment at not seeing any Oscar Wilde in this thread. No list of quotes is complete without some bit of his.

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written.

The well bred contradict other people. The wise contradict themselves.

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.

The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame.

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing.

And finally, which never ceases to amuse me :

Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit.

[Old Ape Face]

"It's okay to be messed up. Just know that there are five guys out there just as messed up as you are."

*Courtesy of Ken
something that should be said with this.
There's nothing wrong with being a loser, it just depends on how good you are at it.

[Caster13]

my signature.

and LMAO to the moving of the bibles. hell im Catholic, and i think thats hilarious.

[goddessofanime]

'Crack is Wack'.

and....

'NY Is in the Muthaf**kin' House!'

[The Million Dollar Prons]

Everything I say.

[Old Ape Face]

Everything I say.

And here is the highlight of my life. :rolleyes:

[Kyuu Dan]

That's no cheerleader. That's my niece Becky. And she's pissed.

That always makes me laugh for some reason.. ^_^

[Caster13]

That always makes me laugh for some reason.. ^_^

So your 300 year old demon girlfriend is the ex-fiance of the Hindu god of distruction....well there goes my brain.

:lol::lol: best. anime. quote. EVER.

[Kyuu Dan]

:lol::lol: best. anime. quote. EVER.

Could be, but Jake McDonald just killed my brain.

[Broand]

This is my 2 cents

*holding Weed as guard subdues him* No officer! That stuffs legal! promise! -A very inexperianced drugdealer

[Bisu]

I haven't been able to get some of the quotes from GLaDOS of Valve's Portal out of my head:


"Please note that we have added a consequence for failure: Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck."


"While safety is one of many Enrichment Center goals, the Aperture Science High Energy Pellet, seen to the left of the chamber, can and has caused permanent disabilities such as vaporization."


"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak."


"Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science Self-Esteem Fund for Girls? It's true!"


...You might have to play the game to understand its humor. -_-;