Ask Pickles...

[pickles133]

Ok so what is the deal? I am trying to establish an "Ask Pickles" forum (not unlike the Ask John forum you guys are running) and I get shut down almost immediately. Seriously, you mods need to chill and let people ask the pickle-mister.

Comeon...this reminds me of a children's fable I heard as a child...you know the one about that race between the tortoise and the pain-in-the-***-moderator-that-everybody-hates. You see the pain-in-the-***-moderator-that-everybody-hates kept running out in front of the tortoise and taunting him, but right at the end... oh, gosh I'm sure you remember what happened...the tortoise bit clean through the moderator's calf muscle, dragged him to the ground, where he and all the other turtles devoured him alive right there on the racetrack. It's a disturbing children's book, I know, but it's one that stuck with me nonetheless.

Now please...please keep me alive and let anyone who is interested post their questions for me - the awesomeness - to answer :naughty:

[The Million Dollar Prons]

WHAT

- Prons

[pickles133]

WHAT

- Prons

WHAT!?!?? OK!!!!

[hitoyou]

i got questions!

[1]Is neon genesis Evangelion the best Anime ever?
[2]why is your name pickles?
[3]are you the tortoise?

thanks!

[pickles133]

i got questions!

[1]Is neon genesis Evangelion the best Anime ever?
[2]why is your name pickles?
[3]are you the tortoise?

thanks!

First poster...I shall answer your questions to the best of my ability.

[1] I believe that there is no true answer to this question. It is like asking "How awesome is pickles133?" Just not possible to tell because my awesomeness cannot be quantified. So we come to NGE...being the best means it sucks less than everything else possible. This is arbitrary as well because you cannot finely define the amount something sucks...just obvious comparisons. Let me put it in a different light. Suppose we have two items...a pen and a flag pole. We can eyeball it and say "Oh the flagpole is definately taller/longer than the pen" without a ruler...which is analagous to good anime vs bad anime. However when comparing two flagpoles of roughly the same height, there is just no way to tell unless you have a ruler. In anime's case...there is no ruler and so we are left to speculation. So in conclusion, NGE may or may not be the best anime ever; however it certainly is sucked a lot less to say...Yu-Gi-OH or the 254th season of Pokemon.

[2] Pickles133 is infact my undercover name. I acquired it a few years ago in my clan's chatroom as it was infact handed down to me. I used it to infiltrate all rival clans's databases to easily destroy the competition. Back then, I was just learning to harness the Awesomeness AEther I possessed. Times were rough then but I got through it.

[3] Yes I am The Tortoise of the main story. It may be a bit odd to hear this because I am also the one being told that story but it all makes sense once you understand Pickles's Principle of Awesomeness. When you see the tortoise as well as the other...tortoi? They are just future versions of me feasting on the pain-in-the-***-moderator's corpse. This is then reproduced into the child's fable book that we all have come to love. My awesomeness lives outside time and space. Of course, it has been misread and misinterpretted since it got to you so perhaps you may have heard something different.

[The Million Dollar Prons]

how do i shot web

[pickles133]

how do i shot web

Please elaborate...what kind of web?

[The Million Dollar Prons]

web

- prn

[sailornyanko]

Uh... are you hotter than Camus from Saint Seiya? If so, explain why.

[pickles133]

web

- prn

I can only assume you mean sticky annoying web that spiderman shoots. This is what you do. You put a spider into a tube. Next you inject the spider with steroids. This is your web producing spider. Now to shoot the web, what you must do is put a rope on one of the legs of the spider. You then open the tube and throw it to your destination. Allow 10-20 mins for the spider to make your web. Then tug on the rope and return him into his tube. Dont worry about breaking off one of the legs of the spider because the steroids will make the spider very very strong...however not strong enough to withstand a shoe if it becomes insolent.

[The Million Dollar Prons]

k

how do i shot web

[pickles133]

Uh... are you hotter than Camus from Saint Seiya? If so, explain why.

I am sorry but I do not compare myself with those that are not of living flesh.

[pickles133]

k

how do i shot web

Terribly sorry...4chan stuff isn't really my specialty. I do however have a consultant on such matters...Joeshie. I will forward your question to him and he will give you the appropriate answer.

[VidelCoolGirl]

Wow. Ok. What are your thoughts on Battle Athletes Victory? And isn't Noir kickass?

-Videl

[ryushe]

Question: pickles, In a clear and concise answer, Why are you so awesome? Use detail's if needed.