[Suzumiya Haruhi] The Wrong Impression

[alextfish]

Hello, all!
I've written a piece of Suzumiya Haruhi fanfiction, and wanted to post it here. I'd love to hear any comments or criticism.

"The Wrong Impression"
(a oneshot fanfic for the new cult series "The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi", including spoilers for episode 12)
Genre: Comedy / Romance
Rating: G/PG

In which Haruhi's efforts to acquire fame for the SOS-dan are frustrated once again.

It's got three chapters, and in true Suzumiya Haruhi style, the order in which they're intended to be written is not the chronological order in which they happen!

You can read it here: http://www.sos-dan.com/forums/showpost.php?p=13820&postcount=22

I'd love to hear any thoughts.

[Leader Desslock]

I wondered when someone was going to post a Haruhi fanfic. ^_^ It takes guts to write a story about a series that has: a) such intricate writing, and b) an intense fanbase.

I read the work. Decent job for a one-shot, I thought. My only real point of discussion is that it might've been a bit too conveniently resolved. Did you have that feeling as well?

[alextfish]

I wondered when someone was going to post a Haruhi fanfic. ^_^ It takes guts to write a story about a series that has: a) such intricate writing, and b) an intense fanbase.Yeah, it could be quite an intimidating undertaking... I guess my only attempt to avoid that was trying to keep it light, which is the feel of the second (chronological) half of the series anyway.

I read the work. Decent job for a one-shot, I thought. My only real point of discussion is that it might've been a bit too conveniently resolved. Did you have that feeling as well?Hmm, I can see what you mean, I think, although it didn't particularly occur to me until you mentioned it.
Do you mean you think Haruhi was out of character whenshe gave up her rage so quickly? Or that the reason for them not getting signed was a bit flimsy?

The former I really tried to make believable - it certainly had immense consequences the other time that Kyon gave her a visible display of affection.

The latter, however, you might have a good point. If I had to pick one part of the story that I thought was flimsy, "the explanation for why the scouts reject them" would be it.

My aims were to have a payoff both at the "chronological" end of the story (end of scene 3) and at the "broadcast" end (end of scene 1). I decided to go for a romantic payoff for scene 3 and a comic one for scene 1, but maybe they might have been better the other way round.

Still, it was fun to write... providing a little more escape into Haruhi's world for those of us who miss getting to watch new episodes :)