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View Full Version : Uwe Boll wants to fight you


Reidar.
June 12th, 2006, 04:48 PM
http://www.gamespot.com/news/show_blog_entry.php?topic_id=24707327&sid=6152650

"I am fed up," said Boll. "I'm fed up with people slamming my films on the Internet without see[ing] them. Many journalists make value judgments on my films based on the opinions of one or two thousand Internet voices. Half of those opinions come from people who've never watched my films."

To answer his critics, Boll is orchestrating what might be considered one of the more bizarre sweepstakes in memory. After he finishes the ongoing shoot of In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, and the subsequent project, Seed, starring the TV incarnation of Conan the Barbarian, bodybuilder Ralf Moeller (Gladiator), Boll will move onto the big-screen version of studio Running With Scissors' controversial Postal series. During that shoot, Boll will personally take on his biggest detractors in boxing matches to be used in the film.

"Towards the end of the filming of Postal the five most outspoken critics will be flown into Vancouver and supplied with hotel rooms," read Boll's press release. "As a guest of Uwe Boll they will be given the chance to be an extra/stand-in in Postal and have the opportunity to put on boxing gloves and enter a BOXING RING [emphasis in the original] to fight Uwe Boll. Each critic will have the opportunity to bring down Uwe in a 10-bout match. There will be five matches planned over the last two days of the movie. Certain scenes from these boxing matches will become part of the Postal movie. All five fights will be televised on the Internet and will be covered by international press."

However, not just anyone who is so inclined will have the chance to put the smackdown on Boll. "To be eligible you must be a critic who has posted on the Internet or have written in magazines/newspapers at least two extremely negative articles in the year 2005. Critics of 2006 will not be considered," said Boll's statement, meaning that said disparaging reviews must predate the theatrical release of BloodRayne.

Now, I was wondering if anyone had any public criticism posts on here or a blog or whatever pre-dating 2006 that I can borrow? I want to take him up on his offer; it sounds like fun.

Leader Desslock
June 12th, 2006, 04:54 PM
Man, oh, man. I would pay to be one of his contestants. I'd love to hit him once for every minute of my life I wasted watching House Of The Dead.

HOW, Uwe? How can you screw up a film like that?

Holy Knight
June 12th, 2006, 05:00 PM
So sorry reidar, but I'd give it to ya if I had one. I would LOVE to see him get pummeled.

Genius, Uwe, genius. We get to see the guy get bashed!

Sushikins
June 12th, 2006, 05:01 PM
I've never seen any of his films, and I have no incentive too, but that does sound fun.

GreatNekoKoneko
June 12th, 2006, 05:14 PM
...everybody get in line for the whoopin of the century...

Batou
June 12th, 2006, 05:39 PM
Theaters need to stop showing Uwe Boll films. This sweepstakes thing seems like a publitcty stunt to get people to watch Postal. Boll isn't going to last 2 minutes with anybody who genuinely hates him and his films and is pratically foaming at the mouth for this kind of opportunity. I have never seen a Boll film, nor do I plan to. His crap does not get enough positive criticsm for me to take notice.
Can anyone tell me if Boll is a gamer, and does or does not play the games he makes films out of?

Reidar.
June 12th, 2006, 07:21 PM
Uwe Boll should be in the new Smash Brothers.

Bolo
June 12th, 2006, 07:54 PM
Uwe Boll should be in the new Smash Brothers.
Of course his only move in the game would be "suck"

Ikari Warrior
June 12th, 2006, 07:57 PM
Of course his only move in the game would be "suck"
But that's kirby's move (pun, I don't think kirby sucks)

and Reidar, I think you or one of the other guys who do martial arts on AN should try & get in Postal. To get to see one of our AN'ers beat the snot out of a long-hated director, that'd be great.

HitokiriShadow
June 12th, 2006, 10:31 PM
I don't think I've ever seen any of his films as I see very few video game based movies. But I've heard enought to know that I should save his movies for when A) I want to watch something just to make fun of it or B) I'm just feeling masochistic.

Usually, even a really bad movie gets something good said about it somewhere. I have yet to hear anything good about his movies. Granted, I haven't exactly sought out reviews for his movies, but usually someone will leap to a heavily criticized movie's defense in online forums.

And I just love the guy's attitude as well. "Everyone hates my movies? Why, they OBVIOUSLY haven't seen them. It couldn't POSSIBLY be that I just suck at making movies."

Animematt55
June 12th, 2006, 10:49 PM
If he doesnt want peopel slammign his films...he should make better ones.
I mean he has totally screwed up a bunch of game movies....

Sendo Takeshi
June 13th, 2006, 12:35 AM
Look at that. He even wreaks of suckiness when issuing a challenge. WTF? Boxing? I would have gone as far as saying a duel with pistols or a sword fight. Either or.

Plus, I believe that the internet > Uwe Boll. After all, last time we checked we(the gaming nerds) know more about the material than he knows about changing the film on a camera?

CrossboneGundam
June 13th, 2006, 12:49 AM
Uwe Boll is ignoring the fact that all of his movies are steaming piles of fecal matter. Whether or not people want to fight him is irrelevant. That won't make his movies magically stop sucking a**.

Rain
June 13th, 2006, 12:50 AM
It's gonna be in Vancouver? For serious? I'm going!

Okay, seriously, have any of his English movies been good?! House of the Dead, Bloodrayne and... what's the other one? Alone in the Dark?!

I've seen all three and... yea, they were terrible to say the least. Tara Reid can't act FFS.

Zero Interrupt
June 13th, 2006, 12:55 AM
Being a 6'4" cornfed farmboy from Texas, I want in.

emotoaster
June 13th, 2006, 07:31 AM
I'll fight him with one arm...serious some one cut off my left that will surely get me in...I WANT THIS BAD!

Gundam_Warrior1
June 13th, 2006, 09:54 AM
Screw boxing gloves! I will bring a baseball bat and a Desert Eagle.

Reidar
September 7th, 2006, 09:15 AM
This is the first "fight": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjM2w5FOPQw

Pathetic.

Leader Desslock
September 7th, 2006, 09:30 AM
Please tell me that Boll was the one in the black t-shirt.

Judging by his performance, the guy in the light-colored t-shirt wasn't actually qualified to get into a pillow fight. He had a strong aversion to being hit. Even with the gloves, even with the headgear, even with the pathetic slaps he was receiving, he just seemed like he couldn't bear to be touched.

I've been to some sad amateur fights, but that was perhaps the worst I've ever seen.

Fobb
September 7th, 2006, 09:42 AM
Haha, never seen any of his films, but this might be interesting. Ask one of the mods to mess around with the date on a current post to make it look like you made an extremely negative remark in 2005 instead of just today.

Reidar
September 7th, 2006, 11:20 AM
Boll is in the black. Heavens forbid we expect the people who signed up for this to actually know what they're doing. Don't they see what's at stake here? We'll probably get a The House of the Dead sequel now.

Pickie
September 7th, 2006, 11:56 AM
Boll is in the black. Heavens forbid we expect the people who signed up for this to actually know what they're doing. Don't they see what's at stake here? We'll probably get a The House of the Dead sequel now.

There already is a HotD 2 (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0435665/)

Reidar
September 7th, 2006, 11:57 AM
I hate it when I'm right.